Sunday, July 9, 2017

Mocha Oreo :(

Mocha Oreo.




History: 

Like everyone I have daily rituals and coffee is amongst my most sacred. Not surprising. I started drinking coffee in college as an alternative to my first and truest liquid love Diet Mountain Dew, which I have been trying to kick since 2005. It didn't work and instead I developed a happy habit of drinking coffee or/and DMD every day. For the past ten years.

When I drink coffee with creme or milk (no sugar, wtf) - just enough to give it a light mocha color but not enough to remove the bitterness completely. I'll take it dark if I have to.  I have no mercurial preference for how the coffee itself tastes. I couldn't tell you how different roasts work or how certain beans differ. My taste in food has never been terribly picky (I mean, Diet Mountain Dew).

My favorite ice cream flavor is coffee (particularly Blue Bell Brand which isn't sold in Indiana anymore, apparently). When coffee isn't available mocha is generally a decent substitute - my use of milk and creme in coffee generally pushes it a little closer to a mocha-style beverage anyway. I enjoy chocolate covered espresso beans, mocha candy bars, mocha milkshakes. Most coffee-flavored or related products are on my either my 'tried' or 'to try' list.

For as long as I have enjoyed Oreo I have hoped for a coffee or mocha variant. At long last Mocha Oreo is available as the third and final 'breakfast' flavor (after Jelly Donut and Waffle & Syrup).

Cookie:

A chocolate Oreo, still the best of the bunch and perfectly suited to pair with a mocha flavor

Creme:

Bullshit. This isn't what I was hoping for. I don't mind Dunkin' Donuts but there's no question that their coffee is generally on the  burnt side (look, I don't really discern bean flavor but burnt isn't beyond my perception). I don't mind drinking burnt coffee, but somehow the Mocha Oreo has a rather tasteless creme with a harsh burnt aftertaste. It's an odd cookie experience because the longer you eat it, the worse it gets. Mocha should be sweet with a slight bitter aftertaste. It should, at the least, feel a little creamy. Mocha Oreo does not capture any part of the ideal Mocha experience.

Gorgeability:

I hoped for a cookie that I would want to eat forever, that I might want to stock up on for when they disappear off shelves (like Pumpkin Spice Oreo or Caramel Apple Oreo). No such luck.

Rating:
2/5 Oreo.




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