S'More Sappy Posts about Oreo
Cookies
S'More Oreos could be called Smoreos,
but if they did that I would sue them for copyright infringement as
the owner of any contraction – pun using the word “Oreo.” Put
that between your cookies and toast it.
The first time these delightful cookies
were released was back in April 2015, around the time I was leaving
my job at Half-Price Books. That job is when all of this really
started in earnest: I would buy packs of Oreos with the intention of
bringing them in to see how my coworkers felt about them. Oreos were
a part of my life before working at Half-Price but it wasn't until
that job that I really had a way of not just eating a ton by myself
and getting burned out. Bringing cookies to work has continued
through other jobs to this day. I am introduced to new coworkers as
“The Oreo Guy.”
My last month at Half-Price remains
bittersweet. Every May I feel a wistful mixture of nostalgia and
contemplation, the kind that only comes with knowing you closed out a
period of your life in the right way. It's not a common feeling. I
don't miss working at the bookstore, but think about parts of it
frequently: long Saturdays spent buying books from customers; the
transition from scorching temps out behind the building to the air
conditioning after taking out he trash; standing at the register in a
down period and looking up the long list of books I was hoping to buy
from other stores; leaving that night knowing we'd done a good job,
or at least an adequate one, prepared to come back 9 hours later and
start the cycle all over again. Dealing with complicated customers.
My coworkers, all practicing some kind of art or hobby that made me
realize the best way to be an adult was to make something meaningful.
I'd have never had the confidence to meet my wife if I hadn't had
that job. I remember my goodbye party too, where I brought chocolate chip cookies with Oreos inside of them. Blue cookies Classic. Green for
Mint. Red for S'Mores. Amazing. And my other goodbye party, where I
got drunk in my coworker's back yard and made a giant S'More with big
chocolate chip cookies, kit-kats, and other insane fixings. I could
eat like that back then.
Most of all the feeling of belonging
with a group of people in a way I had never felt before, and really
haven't felt since. I've since belonged in different ways to
different communities. What you need changes. But thank god I
experienced that.
S'More Oreos showed up again in 2016
but by then I was in a much worse place. I'm better now. These
cookies give me the right feelings. No negative associations.
Cookie: Graham Cracker.
Creme: Marshmallow + Milk Chocolate
Gorgeability: Incredible, maybe one of
the most addicting Oreos of all time.
5/5
